virtual reality set? >> oh my. >> we lower the lights. >> little music. >> put a little music on. i actually hasn't seen that reporter clip where the cicada landed on him. and i was truly horrified. >> so i lived in tennessee for almost ten year, and they are everywhere now. >> they are disgusting. >> there is a viral video out there of a reporter in the south who's about to do a stand-up and a fly zoomed right in his mouth. >> he works in houston, texas. nice guy. yeah, that was just -- okay, well, we are grateful to live here in the bay area. and we're grateful you live here too. thanks for watching. the late show >> stormy daniels took the witness stand today at donald trump's criminal trial. they sought to remove any talk

of the hush money payment. quick to celebrate stormy daniels testifying, porn hub has added court hub. you will bang your gavel so hard he will need to take a five minute recess. >> i will be watching. >> announcer: it's "the late show with stephen colbert." tonight... eye of the stormy. first, stephen welcomes... tiffany haddish and meredith scardino. featuring louis cato and "the late show" band. and now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, it's stephen colbert.

♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> stephen: thank you very much. you are very kind. please have a seat, everybody. welcome, ladies and gentlemen, one and all. i'm stephen colbert. it was an historic day in the annals of american law. because this morning, stormy daniels took the stand to do what she does best -- spank donald trump. the fireworks started before court was called to order, when at 7:30 a.m., trump put up this now-deleted post -- "i have just

recently been told who the witness is today. this is unprecedented, no time for lawyers to prepare. no judge has ever run a trial in such a biased and partisan way." no time to prepare? it didn't occur to you or your lawyers that the stormy daniels hush money trial would involve an appearance by stormy daniels? that's like a cook at burger king saying, "oh my god, someone just ordered a whopper! what do we do? i had all these kale caesars ready to go!" trump's lawyers tried to prevent stormy from testifying. before she took the stand, trump's team objected to her including any details of any sexual act, to which prosecutors promised details that are too salacious will not be admitted, and that in terms of the sexual act, it's not going to involve any description of genitalia.

boo! i wanna hear about his itsy-bitsy, teeny-weenie, those-aren't-polka-dots, linguini! what we did get was a thorough retelling of their one night of sexing, when trump and stormy became the celebrity couple “stumpy.” i forgot. not supposed to describe his genitalia. as super fans may recall, stormy met trump in 2006 at a celebrity golf tournament, when he was 60 and she was 27. stormy testified that trump "invited her to dinner through his bodyguard, and that once she arrived at his hotel, he emerged wearing silk or satin pajamas." enchante, my dear. feast your eyes on my slippery torso.

are you ready for our sex dinner? stormy took it in stride, asking him, "does mr. hefner know you stole his pajamas?" well, it was open casket, and they were up for grabs. like when you grab the tablecloth and the plates stay right there. stormy made trump change into real clothes, but they still didn't make it to dinner. instead, trump talked endlessly about himself and showed her a copy of a new magazine that featured him. stormy interrupted and said, "are you always this rude? you don't even know how to have a conversation." to which he responded, "i know i am, but what am i?" stormy then told trump that someone should slap him with the magazine, then she spanked him with it, quote, "right on the butt." there it is. his presidential legacy.

forget the lincoln memorial. one day, school children will travel to washington, d.c. to see the trump monument. nice. nice scale there. after the spanking, stormy said that they sat down to dinner in the hotel suite, where she asked about melania, and he told her not to worry because they didn't even sleep in the same room. yeah, we were having trouble falling asleep in the same bed, because she snores, and i bang porn stars. trump also paid stormy the ultimate compliment, telling her, "you remind me of my daughter." at one point, trump asked stormy about venereal diseases in the adult industry, asking her if she ever had a bad test. because i just passed mine with flying colors -- person, woman,

man, camera, std. then dinner ended, and stormy went to the bathroom in trump's suite and saw a leather-looking toiletry bag. nope! we're not supposed to describe trump's genitals! when she came out of the bathroom, ready to leave, stormy found trump on the bed wearing only his boxers and a t-shirt, a moment she likened to a "jump scare." it's in the new horror movie -- "saw: donald trump's penis." there we go. we are rolling now. now we are going someplace. now we are moving. at the end of her testimony, trump's legal team moved for a

mistrial, arguing that the testimony was overly prejudicial, and that the government was asking questions "to inflame this jury." and it is dangerous to inflame that jury. do you know how much gas donald trump has released in that courtroom? so overall, it was a tough day for trump, but at least it was made worse because eric trump was there. which means he finally learned about the birds and bees. objection, your honor. there's no way that woman had sex with my daddy. she didn't once mention him giving a special kiss to her belly button. cuz that's where the baby comes out. previously on this trial -- yesterday, trump was threatened with jail time if he violated his gag order again. so, he immediately made an appearance outside the court, refusing to be gagged. >> he asked me a simple

question, but i cannot talk about it. this judge has given me a gag order and said you will go to jail if you violate it and frankly, our constitution is more important than jail. it is not even close. i will do that sacrifice any d day. >> stephen: how 'bout tomorrow? [cheers and applause] there is still more news about south dakota governor kristi noem, seen here making a hot dog. noem can't seem to escape the story that she killed her puppy. mostly because she won't stop talking about it. last night, she went on “fox news” and was asked whether she regretted including the story in her book. >> everybody has known that story for years.

they have used that story to attack me for years. i wanted people to know the truth. >> stephen: let me get this straight -- everyone who's heard this story has used it to attack you, so you made it a centerpiece of your book? reminds me of bill clinton's presidential memoir — "my life bangin' interns." it's not just recreational puppy-cide. noem also continues to be called out for a passage in her book where she claims to have met north korean dictator kim jong-un, something which never happened. last night on "newsnation," noem was asked about the kim-jong-lie, and she rolled out this nifty new excuse -- "the you said it was conflated in the book. >> i have met with many world leaders. some of them are in the book. >> why did you remove it? was it untrue? >> i am not going to talk about

it. >> if you are taking it out of the book, it is untrue. >> stephen: the answer is the answer, which is the final answer, regis. i'd like to phone a friend. hello? i need you to call in a bomb threat to 'newsnation.'" oh, this is juicy and dishy. last night was the met gala! every year, here in new york city, the met throws the most exclusive and opulent party. last night's theme was "the garden of time." based on a 1962 short story about elites living in a utopia of leisure, art, and beauty while an encroaching and chaotic mob draws nearer every hour. a little on the nose guys. i'm guessing next year's theme is going to be: "ah! they've breached the doors! quick, hide behind the chagall!" let's take a look at the hot lewks. bad bunny stopped by on the way to puss n' boots' funeral, cardi b came as an elegant oil spill,

and action star michelle yeoh made a dramatic escape from a jiffy pop. i'm being told in my deaf ear that we have urgent animal news coming in. yes, we have “breaking zoos.” today's “breaking zoos” comes from china, where zoo-goers were outraged to discover the panda& exhibit was actually dogs dyed black and white. of course, there's a simple explanation -- the dogs are in a kristi noem protection program. "here she comes! i'm a panda! yum yum! bamboo! nothing to shoot here!" h[cheers and applause] let's take a look at these cleverly disguised canines. who's black and white and cute all over? you are! yes, you are! the zoo apologized for

attempting to trick their customers and offered them a free visit t see their man-garoo. we've got a great show for you tonight. my guests are tiffany haddish and "girls5eva" creator meredith scardino. but when we come back, "meanwhile!" ♪ ♪ >> announcer: "the late show with stephen colbert" sponsored by... allstate. you are in good hands.

♪ ♪ >> stephen: luis cano and the late show band, everybody. tonight is a festival of powerful and talented women. in a moment, tiffany haddish will be here. one of my favorite people in the

world, just a gifted comedian, meredith scardino will be out here. a wonderful person. you know i spent most of my time over there on the news farm, choosing the most topical story cattle with certified pure tajima bloodlines, feeding them only whole crop silage for 900 days while massaging them daily and brushing their haircoat with sake to produce the succulent yet delicate toku-san matsu-saka wagyu beef that is my monologue. but sometimes, i fall out the back of a carjacked hearse where i use a busted hubcap to scrape some meat and fur off the blacktop which i let sit on a hot drainage grate until i can gnaw on the drifter's roadkill jerky of news that is my segment "meanwhile." that is a tasty treat.

arby's new menu items include a beyonce-inspired horsey sauce. you know arby's slogan -- "we have tremendous pressure to appear relevant in a crowded media landscape." meanwhile, in hideous car news, new video has gone viral of a cybertruck owner who broke his finger trying to show that the vehicle is safe. jim? >> i will put it completely flat and see if it crushes my finger, because everybody is asking. >> stephen: oh. well, if everybody is asking, what choice do you have? quick question -- what happens when you stick your dong in a hornet's nest? everybody's asking. and you have a camera right there. now, because he "does his own research," he did make some preliminary scientific inquiries. >> i am going to test it out with this stick. this is exactly what i am going to do with my finger.

hopefully, my finger does not break like that. >> stephen: oh, i'm sorry. the correct answer was "it broke that stick, so, i will not put my finger in there." anyway, point proven, that thing is very clearly and obviously going to hurt you if you stick your finger in there, so no need to find out, right? >> let's find out. let's give this anothe shot. we are closing the cybertruck. i am going to put my finger flat here and we will see what happens. >> stephen: congratulations. you've passed the test and are now the new ceo of tesla. [applause] meanwhile, skittles is holding a contest that will provide the winner with a new york city apartment and pay their rent for a year. a candymaker with a contest where the prize is living in manhattan? it's just like the classic

children's movie, "willy wonka and the rats, oh god, the rats!" a lot of rats here. one lucky skittle enthusiast will get to live in manhattan's first micro-unit apartment building in murray hill, all in celebration of the new candy, skittles littles. so, when you're jammed into your micro-unit you can tell yourself, "i'm not urinating in the kitchen, i'm taking a skittles littles piddle by the griddle." [applause] meanwhile, in kiddie nightmare news, a three-year-old in north carolina thought there was a monster in her wall, but it turned out to be 50,000 bees. i feel bad for that kid, but even worse for the guy who had to count all the bees. "one, two -- stay still!" meanwhile, in frozen treat

surveillance news, a new mister softee tracking app locates every ice cream truck in new york city. which is great for us. maybe not so great for mr. softee. ♪ ♪ we follow mr. softy. hey, there's mr. softy. >> my route is public knowledge. >> you cheating bastard. excited just drove by to tell her how much i love you. >> for two hours? >> i love you so much, that is how long it took. >> she gets your banana split and i get your sad, limp, mr mr. softee. >> stephen: will be right back

with tiffany haddish. ♪ ♪ (mom) the moment i loved our subaru outback most... was the moment they walked away from it. (daughter) mom! (mom) oh, thank goodness. and that's why our family will only drive a subaru. (vo) subaru. more iihs top safety pick plus awards than any other brand. love. it's what makes subaru, subaru. did you know some dish soaps don't remove all the grease, even with scrubbing? whaaat? i just cleaned those! try dawn platinum. it removes 99% of grease and food residue. that's why dawn is trusted to save wildlife affected by oil. dawn platinum cleans to the squeak. ( ♪♪ )

( ♪♪ ) (vo) it's shrimp your way. choose three flavors for just $20*. ( ♪♪ ) like new street corn shrimp. and our famous garlic shrimp scampi. it's time to grab some cheddar bays and get flavorfull. hurry in to try shrimp your way, only at red lobster. t-mobile “savings”, take one. guys, focus. here's the line... “at t-mobile, you get tons of benefits, and you can still save versus the other guys.” focus! hello t-mobile... hold on... you might want to just... ok stop! just say it like this, “at t-mobile, you can save on every plan, and you get great benefits with magenta status." magenta status... yuh! i'll show you my magenta status. ok, i'll just do it. check out the t-mobile savings calculator to see how much you can save. and right now, we'll even pay off your phone when you switch! skin craving next level hydration? neutrogena hydro boost water cream. a vital boost of 9x more hydration

that's clinically proven to boost your skin's barrier for quenched, dewy skin that's full of life. neutrogena hydro boost. when enamel is gone, you cannot get it back. but you can repair it with pronamel repair. it penetrates deep into the tooth to actively repair acid weakened enamel. i recommend pronamel repair. with new pronamel repair mouthwash you can enhance that repair beyond brushing. they work great together. did you know... 80% of women are struggling with hair damage? just like i was. dryness and frizz could be damaged hair that can't retain moisture. new pantene miracle rescue deep conditioner, with first-of-its-kind melting pro-v pearls... locks in moisture to repair 6 months of damage in one wash, without weigh down. guaranteed or your money back!

for resilient, healthy-looking hair... if you know, you know it's pantene. ( ♪♪ ) you made a cow! actually it's a piggy bank. my inspiration to start saving. how about a more solid way to save? i'm listening. well, bmo helps get your savings habit into shape with a cash reward every month you save. both: cash reward? and there's a cash bonus when you open a new checking account to get you started. wow. anything you can't do?

( ♪♪ ) mugs. ♪ bmo ♪ ♪ ♪ >> stephen: welcome back. my first guest is an emmy and

grammy award-winning comedian you know from "girls trip" and her stand-up comedy specials. she has just written a new collection of essays called "i curse you with joy." please welcome back to "the late show," tiffany haddish. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ i like it. >> hi. >> stephen: i like that dress. it is like hugging a naugahyde couch. >> it is fake. >> stephen: it is? >> it doesn't smell like a real animal. >> stephen: nice to see you again. it has been too long since you have been here in person. >> five years. >> last time you were here, you

brought billy crystal. >> i brought him through a zoom. i was saving my heart for you but then i ran into you at the emmys and there was your wife. >> i should have mentioned i was married. >> she was so nice. she called you mister softee. [laughter] >> stephen: how have you been? what has been going on? >> just living life. >> stephen: you are trying this new thing, exercise. >> at first i was doing it back in the day for 20 to 30 minutes. now i am doing it for 50 minutes, waking up early in

the morning, exercising for about 50 minutes and then wash and go back to sleep. >> stephen: and go back to sleep. you go back to sleep after being jacked up on the endorphins? >> yes, because i am tired anyways. i don't know if you know this about me, but i take naps in strange places. >> stephen: if you want to not offer just a second, i will not be offended. >> okay, good. >> stephen: you have a new book. it is called "i curse you would enjoy" and a first of all, i love that term. " what does that mean?

>> i have set it to audiences for years. i put the title of that, because with the internet, people are putting out all of this negativity and words are so powerful. your words create energy and they affect people. >> stephen: you mean like cast a spell? >> everything i speak, it has a power. don't you feel it? i know you do. i feel like when you put words out into the universe, on the internet or what ever, people put out these negative things and you put out bad energy and when i see that, it comes towards me and i say they must be unhappy, they must not have

joy, so i curse you with joy. you must be hurting. >> that is a generous response to other people's negativity. >> then i get on my page and call them fat bitches. [cheers and applause] >> stephen: and then write back to bed. you talk about gaining confidence. >> i don't think i have confidence. i think i am courageous.

you should read it, because then you would know. >> stephen: i think it is more appropriate for you to tell the story. >> when i had the penis in my panties. i would love to hear you say that and i would say yes, i had a penis in my panties. >> stephen: tell me about the time you had a prosthetic penis in your panties. >> the host of the show gave me the prosthetic and it was kind of limp. it was my parting gift for being in a podcast. i put it on my dresser and i would go to the comedy club and i wasn't getting respect and people were calling me but not

inviting me to do sets. it was a boys club and i did not get it. i put the prosthetic in my panties. i started walking different, you move different and may be my energy different. people were talking to me, saying do you want to come to dinner with us. when i was doing my comedy, it was bigger and better because i had a penis in my panties. i was ahead of my time. >> stephen: when these people would hug you, how close were they? >> they couldn't feel it. i made sure. if it fell out, it would have been hilarious. >> stephen: do you recommend this? >> i walked different.

i feel like i still carry that walk. when i am feeling low, it is like oh [bleep], where is your penis at? if entertainment did not work out for me, i would be a tea teacher. things i wish somebody would have told me. my tiffnicity was broken. she doesn't stop, she don't quit. she is full of tenacity. tiffnicity. >> stephen: what would it be if you were the world's greatest sex ed teacher, what would be on

the final exam? >> high jean, selection. laying down with somebody is powerful. you can put your thing and whatever and it doesn't matter. we will be back with more tiffany haddish. don't go anywhere. ♪ ♪ that's why he switched to dovato. dovato is a complete hiv treatment for some adults. no other complete hiv pill uses fewer medicines to help keep you undetectable than dovato. detect this: marnina learned that most hiv pills contain 3 or 4 medicines. dovato is as effective with just 2. if you have hepatitis b, don't stop dovato

without talking to your doctor. don't take dovato if you're allergic to its ingredients or taking dofetilide. this can cause serious or life-threatening side effects. if you have a rash or allergic reaction symptoms, stop dovato and get medical help right away. serious or life-threatening lactic acid buildup and liver problems can occur. tell your doctor if you have kidney or liver problems, or if you are pregnant, breastfeeding, or considering pregnancy. dovato may harm an unborn baby. most common side effects are headache, nausea, diarrhea, trouble sleeping, tiredness, and anxiety. detect this: you could stay undetectable with fewer medicines. ask your doctor about dovato. sfx: [birds chirping] for nourished, lightweight hair, the right ingredients make all the difference. new herbal essences sulfate free is now packed with plant-based ingredients your hair will love. like pure aloe. and camellia flower oil. and none of the things it won't. hair feels deeply nourished, soft and lightweight. plant power you can feel.

new herbal essences sulfate free. it's time. yes, the time has come for a fresh approach to dog food. everyday, more dog people are deciding it's time to quit the kibble and feed their dogs fresh food from the farmer's dog. made by vets and delivered right to your door precisely portioned for your dog's needs. it's an idea whose time has come. ♪♪ [ doorbell rings ] you must be isaac. come on in. it's an idea whose time has come. [ sighs ] here's my pride and joy. [ romantic music plays ] ♪♪ beautiful stair renovation, sir. and they're covered with your home and auto bundle with progressive, so you get round-the-clock protection. so, is gabby coming down?

oh, she said she'll meet you at the prom. target manager hailee! listen, i wanted you to be the first to know... target now has unlimited same-day delivery with target circle 360? how'd you know that? let's just say a little bird told me... hey lady, did you hear the news? get the fastest delivery to your door, with target circle 360. (♪♪) when life spells heartburn... how do you spell relief? r-o-l-a-i-d-s rolaids' dual-active formula begins to neutralize acid on contact. r-o-l-a-i-d-s spells relief.

♪ ♪ >> stephen: we are back with the author of "i curse you with joy." >> i go on dates and stuff. i love a free meal. i go on dates all the time. >> stephen: any exciting dates? >> i went to brunch with a guy that was nice and attentive and kind and i like that, but i don't necessarily want to let everybody in. i want to make sure they qualify to be inside of my tiffnicity.

i need to check your credit score, if you don't want to share with me, i will find it, don't worry. i want them to have a ein number. you know it. you are already winning. if you don't know what that is, i don't want nothing to do with you. i want to know you have employees that like working with you because if i let you inside of me. i need a good leader. >> stephen: would it be accurate to say you don't want no scrubs? >> i don't mind if he scrubs the kitchen floor. i don't mind it if he cleans. i like acts of service. >> stephen: you have a lot of revelations in this book about your relationships, with your parents, what it is like to be

black in america, the challenges having children of your own. why are you comfortable sharing your life. some just want their personal life and the personal life stays out of the public eye. >> i can't be the only person in the world who has gone through these things. people see you are a celebrity and they think your life is perfect and it is nice but it is not. it is hard and difficult and i live in front of everybody and it sucks some days and some days it is awesome but i want people to know you are not the only person going through crazy st stuff, not the only one who made mistakes and if you made& mistakes it doesn't mean you are not a good person and you cannot be where you want to be in life. [cheers and applause] >> stephen: thank you for being here. it is always good to talk to y

you. "i curse you with joy" is on sale now. tiffany haddish, everybody. we'll be right back with the creator of "girls5eva," meredith scardino. feeling sluggish or weighed down? could be a sign that your digestive system isn't at its best. but a little metamucil everyday can help. metamucil's psyllium fiber gels to trap and remove the waste that weighs you down and also helps lower cholesterol and slows sugar absorption to promote healthy blood sugar levels. so you can feel lighter and more energetic. lighten everyday the metamucil way. feel less sluggish & weighed down after just 14 days. sign up for the 2 week challenge at metamucil.com marshalls buyers have a very particular set of skills. ♪♪ they can hunt down the latest trends. double denim is back. so chic. ♪♪ and take quality very, very seriously. ♪♪ ceramic. they're highly trained, deal making professionals.

who travel far and wide to hustle the best of the best for you. we get the deals, you get the good stuff. marshalls. [ "la donna" by vechi playing ] george, can you turn the music off? george? george! [ phone ringing ] george, can you get that? george! agh! george. hello george, can you mute the music? [ id.4 voice assistant ] alright. [ music stops ] thank you, george. for what? ♪ ♪ this is a hero, walking his youngest down the aisle. which, to his bladder, feels like a mile. yet he stands strong, dry, keeping the leaks only to his eyes. depend, the only thing stronger than us, is you. to help protect from hiv, i prep without pills.

with apretude, a prescription medicine used to reduce the risk of hiv without daily prep pills. with one shot every other month, just 6 times a year. in studies, apretude was proven superior to a daily prep pill in reducing the risk of hiv. you must be hiv negative, to receive apretude and get tested before each injection. if you think you were exposed to hiv or have flu-like symptoms, tell your doctor right away. apretude does not prevent other sexually transmitted infections. practice safer sex to reduce your risk. don't take apretude if you're allergic to it or taking certain medicines, as they may interact. tell your doctor if you've had liver or kidney problems or mental health concerns. if you have a rash or other allergic reactions, stop apretude and get medical help right away. serious side effects include allergic reactions, liver problems, and depression. some of the most common side effects include injection-site reactions and headache. you must receive apretude as scheduled. ask your doctor about long-acting apretude. and prep without pills. save at apretude.com.

♪ ♪ >> stephen: welcome back to

"the late show." i have known my next guest since she was a writer on a little show called "the colbert report." now, she's the creator and netflix series "girls5eva." >> you don't even dress yourself. >> i have dressed myself. wait. wait. wait. wait. oh, my god. i haven't. ever. >> not possible. >> no, my dad used to dress me like a doll. >> it is time for you to just be yourself. >> myself?

>> hey, queen. >> hey, king. no. >> stephen: please welcome meredith scardino. ♪ ♪ hi. >> i realize i don't know how to sit in these pants. >> stephen: have you ever sat in them before? >> no, i was mostly standing. >> stephen: that is it. you just sank right into it. you are a natural. tell the people what "girls5ev" is. it is a hilarious show everyone should be watching. >> it is on netflix. there are three seasons. a third season just dropped.

it is about a reunited one-hit wonder girl group. it has sarah ba, many guest sta. >> stephen: i was one of the guest stars in the first season. >> you said yes before you even knew i created the show. it was amazing. he played a character -- a swedish producer, there he is. >> stephen: i really wanted -- be honest. we are old friends. what was i like to work with? >> you were very off book. so off book.

>> stephen: that is the second nicest thing you could have s said. >> what is the first thing i could have said? >> stephen: funny. >> you were the funniest person. you were hilarious and we only had you for one day because of your schedule. we had to shoot 18 pages in one day so we had a zillion cameras covering things and you were fully off book, hilarious. one thing that was funny, we were scrambling to find somebody who could coach you on the swedish accent. >> stephen: there were swedish words i had to say. >> i found a writer's assistant who had a great aunt and they got this lady on the phone to tell stephen how to announce a few things and i said i had this lady who can talk to you and you said it is okay, i called alexander st skarsgard.

>> stephen: he called me back from stockholm and read the entire script to me. >> your life is very weird. >> stephen: it is. i admire your comity immensely. at what point did you decide this is what i am going to do with my life? >> when i was young, i feel like nobody pays attention to the youngest. i had unfettered access to television. i loved comedy. we watched stand up spotlight on vh1. i remember being a little kid,

maybe eight and i was in bed and i said, do you have what it takes to be in the world of comedy and i said, give yourself some suggestions and see if you can be funny about anything and i thought, dog and in my brain, i went my dog man, my dog is crazy and i was like, you've got it. [laughter and applause] >> stephen: you are your own best audience, too. how long were you there? >> six years. >> stephen: every day you come in with enormous energy. are there any favorites you had that made it to air?

>> the whole style of the show was fun. you wake up in the morning, you scroll and you are in the shower trying to think of something and even looking at the ticker on taxi tv, is there something and then i would shout everything at you out one volume. some of the things i loved about the show, in the morning, you could pitch something that involved a puma and around 4:00, a lynx would show up because a puma was too dangerous. >> stephen: you wanted a mountain lion and we found out it was $10,000 to erect the fence between the mountain lion and the audience, so we could not do it. my executive producer said one of his most famous quotes. anything that might eat the

audience is going to be i didn't ask you some of these things because i know you too well to ask you questions. anything on your mind before we go? >> can i tell you a story about my dad? i brought my parents to the first enemies. >> stephen: the first year you wrote is the first year we won the enemy and it is not a coincidence. >> i brought my parents and they loved it and they had a great time. we won and i had the trophy, and my dad, who is a serial entrepreneur. he has been in telecom, everything. he is very scrappy. i am scrappy like him.

he puts this pair of glasses on me and he takes my picture. that is it. he takes my picture and i am like what is going on? >> he says we just need a picture of stephen colbert wearing these and you both make $1,000. he knew a guy with an eyeglass store and he told him he would get him a celebrity endorsement and i said i am not asking him. >> stephen: tells frank to mail me the glasses. meredith, such a delight. i feel strange shaking your hand. lovely to meet you. seasons one, two, and three of "girls5eva" are available on netflix. meredith scardino, everybody. we'll be right back. ♪ ♪

>> stephen: that's it for "the late show." tune in tomorrow when my guest will be jen psaki. now stick around for "after midnight" with taylor tomlinson and her guest, mike birbiglia. goodnight. ♪ ♪